Shame is one of the trickier emotions to understand. It can be complex for those unaware of its purpose. While shame can serve some adaptive social roles, in some cases it can be toxic for relationships and individuals. Knowing the distinction is crucial. Shame is a social emotion. Shame is one of the most important […]
Talking about divorce can be scary for any couple. However, many of the couples in therapy come in for just this reason: the threat of divorce. It can be difficult to decipher whether this is really the end for us or if they are just protesting. At Cycles Couples Counseling we will help you to […]
Anger Management is a phrase many couples throw around in couples therapy. They insist their partner needs to go work on their "anger issues." "He's always yelling and it's terrifying." "She is so dramatic. She freaks out over everything." Frequently, partners try to shut their reactions down, by either doing one of two things—yelling back […]
Congratulations! You made it past the biggest hurdle, you and your partner decided to finally try couples therapy. This is probably one of the bravest decisions you can make. Deciding to enter therapy and share emotions with a third party can be very vulnerable. Finding a couples therapist can feel overwhelming. Okay, we’re down to […]
Why does my couples therapist keep making us do enactments? One of the most frequent protests an Emotionally Focused Therapist hears is about the “turn and share” part of therapy. In Emotionally Focused Therapy we refer to these mini impromptu conversations as enactments. “Didn’t I just say it?” “This is awkward.” “They already know.” “They […]
Society has really done a disservice to men. It’s taught them to “man up” and not show their emotions. We see this in tv, movies, in sports, and sometimes even in the family system. This message is so pervasive. Be tough! Be aggressive! Don’t cry! That’s weak! Be independent! The basic gist of all these […]
Why can't we move past this?? At Cycles Couples Counseling, we frequently help couples that are longing to heal from past relationship injuries. These hurts to attachment bonds can present themselves most often as affairs or other betrayals. It’s harmful to feel your partner is not there in your time of need, or even worse, […]
How do we know when we're ready? Good question--How do you know when you are ready to stop couples therapy? Knowing when to end therapy takes careful planning. You, your partner and your therapist should take special consideration in deciding to wrap up couples counseling. Here we will offer some milestones and goals most therapists […]
Is it over yet?? We get it. No one looks forward to counseling. It’s kind of like going to the dentist’s office—necessary to stay healthy, but not exactly appealing. How long do we need to do this? When can I be done? What’s the typical number of […]
You're finally ready to start counseling. Congratulations! The hardest part is over. After scouring the Internet and looking for your perfect fit, you made the decision to finally start therapy. For many this can be nerve-racking, scary or even embarrassing. While everyone understands a trip to the dentist’s or a doctor’s appointment, counseling, unfortunately sometimes [&h
